Affairs of the heart – it’s never easy, it’s always bittersweet.
On one hand, you enjoy having someone to call your own and tell him or her all your deepest darkest secrets and greatest fears. On the other, you get upset, annoyed even at his or her certain quirks and behaviours that drive you up the wall.
No one is perfect but should you stay or leave at the first sign of trouble?
VenusBuzz.com looks into these 10 relationship deal breakers that every girl should be aware of.
1. He has personal hygiene issues
Apart from the occasional deodorant failure, someone who can’t be bothered to care for his appearance is a major turnoff and a good sign for you to run. If he can’t put in an effort to keep himself clean and smelling good, you’ll be looking at endless days of nagging him to shower, shave and scrub more often. And nobody likes a nag now, do we?
2. He’s a giant flirt
There’s a difference between just checking women out and actually interacting with them on a regular basis in an overtly friendly manner to say the least. Does he tend to get texts or FB messages from (good looking) women all the time? Or is he always trying to charm the socks off the waitress, shop assistant girls or his female friends? You could be looking at a lifetime of jealousy and suspicion over his every move here.
3. He puts you down
In any successful partnership, support and encouragement are two important keywords. You’re supposed to build each other’s sense of self-worth and confidence. If your partner is always humiliating you in front of other people or criticising you every chance he gets, he is really just a bully. The more he makes you feel stupid or small, the more destructive the relationship would become.
4. He’s a controlling freak
A relationship may involve two person but for it to grow, you need to allow each partner to be your own person. But if he’s just looking to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do because he “cares and wants to put your best interest first”, this is not right. He is less interested in the person you are and more concerned about moulding you into the person that he thinks he deserves.
5. He’s inconsiderate
To be in a relationship, there should be an equal amount of respect and consideration. He says he’s going to call you but didn’t or he cancels dinner plans with you at the last minute because he just got invited to a party with his friends. These sort of behaviours are an indication of the kind of person he is or the man he’s becoming as he gets too comfy with you and the relationship. This will only cause resentment as one excuse takes on another.
6. He’s non-committal
If the boyfriend can’t make you feel secure or loved, there’s a major problem here. We go into relationships in the hopes of seeing whether there’s a future for us, but if one of the ‘us’ is busy chasing his own dreams (or other woman’s ass) and leaving the other ‘us’ out of the equation, there really isn’t a point for the relationship. Being non-committal will just cause feelings of uncertainty and vulnerability as you lay your unrequited feelings bare.
7. He pressures you
A lot of times, when we are in love, it’s very hard to say no and take a stance for ourselves. But remember this, if your man respects you enough, he won’t pressure you into doing something you’re not comfortable with. If you really don’t want to take your relationship to the next level in bed, then don’t! And if he demands sex or uses that “do it for me” card, time to get out of the relationship.
8. He’s never happy
When we get together with someone, we want nothing more than to make that person happy, right? In fact, it’s probably one of the nicest things about a relationship. But if either one of you is feeling that nothing is ever good enough or whatever you’re doing still can’t make him happy, it’s a sign of more frustration to come. This is a deal breaker because you’ll end up feeling helpless and hopeless.
9. He cheated on you
“She came onto me”, “we were drunk”, “it didn’t mean anything”… there’s never a good reason for a person to stray. Yes, people deserve a second chance but consider this, would you be able to trust him again? Are you going to be calm and collected about every girl that crosses his path? Cheating is never ok because it means the bond and trust you shared with each other is not important enough to be respected.
10. He abuses you
Need we say more? Physical, emotional or verbal, abuse have no place in a relationship.