Is it okay to spy on our teens?
Teens crave independence and privacy, and while most parents are happy to allow their teen some space, they’re also concerned about keeping their child safe from the influence of drugs and alcohol. How then do we strike a balance?
No lectures
For one thing, it’s good to keep in mind that no one likes lectures, especially teens. Ultimatums probably won’t work their way into a teen’s head. Instead, explain to them in a conversational fashion why you disapprove of drugs and alcohol. Discuss the dangers of substance abuse, such as addiction, organ and brain damage. Remind them that substance abuse leads to impaired judgment, which could cause serious injuries and even death.
Awkwardness
Sometimes, talking to a teen can be awkward for the both of you. Experts recommend approaching sensitive subjects when you’re not face to face. Bring it up when riding in the car or doing dishes, for example. Also, allow your teen to speak freely, don’t judge or reprimand. It’s better than having him or her clam up on you.
Eavesdrop
Teens may guard their privacy like their lives depended on it, but what their lives and safety really depend on is YOU. Follow your gut, if you suspect something, go ahead and listen in your teen’s telephone conversations or when they have their friends over. It is also alright to check their computer’s internet history. Don’t feel bad. Even experts, like Dr. Drew Pinsky, recommend spot-checking your teen’s room.
Be a CSI
What do Crime Scene Investigators do? They collect evidence. If your teenager’s unusual behaviour concerns you, make note of them as they occur. Watch out for falling grades, lack of appetite, erratic sleeping patterns and disinterest in their favourite activity. Also, keep a watch for strange pills or empty medicine bottles.
Stay calm, be supportive
If you suspect your teen is abusing drugs or alcohol, pick a time when you’re both calm and talk things over. Explain why you’re concerned and mention the unusual behaviour you’ve been noticing and the evidence you’ve collected. If the problem appears serious, accompany your teen to a drug or alcohol evaluation assessment and allow a professional to recommend the best course of action or treatment.
Teens on drugs and booze? What do you do? http://t.co/3liXMtKv