Over thinking (literally) brings you nowhere
Have you ever thought about the things you’d like to do now but, which you put off because you’re waiting for a relationship? You know, it is when you find yourself making decisions like, ‘I’ll buy a home once I’m married’ or ‘I’ve always wanted to go to Tahiti but I won’t go until I meet someone’ or ‘I’d love to have a dog but want to find a partner first.’
This ‘waiting until” business may actually BACKFIRE on you. When you put off things you crave today while waiting for when, ‘someday my prince will come,’ you make yourself less alive and present for the life you’re living now. You may, in fact, put too much pressure on a future that may never materialize.
Well, when I use the phrase ‘never materialize’, I mean, goals that go along the likes of – ‘I’m going to meet my Mr. Right soon and get married in 5 years time’ or ‘I’m going to make sure my future partner will share a similar passion about saving the earth and preserving animal/plant life with me’.
Such optimism in getting there, on top of things in your life is wonderful of course’ but really, it may put unwarranted pressure on your subconscious, causing you to over-assess situations, or make a premature decision on something critical.
So, what I am trying to say here is – don’t plan to live only for dreams & goals based on a future (no matter how rosy it seems) that is yet to be realised. The negativeness of living onwards in the hopes of achieving that momentous moment is definately a common action that befalls men and women. I would term it as ‘living, but not living as life is meant to be’.
When you live your life TODAY as though it’s the life of your dreams, you exude a joy, enthusiasm and authenticity that makes you much more attractive to everyone you meet! And who knows? The perfect partner for you may just be the realtor that sells you your first home, or in the cabana next to yours on the beach in Tahiti, or their dog may fall for yours at the dog park.
In other words, the dreams you have may LEAD you to love, not keep you from it! Like that old line in a movie (Field of Dreams) that says – ‘If you build it, HE will come.’
So many people put off their dreams because something in their personal life isn’t where they want it to be. They think the joy they seek is in someone else’s hands out there SOMEWHERE – and that once they have a relationship THEN they’ll be happy and can have the things they long for at last. Well yeah’that is how things go for fairy tales, isn’t it?
I believe fervently in the saying – ‘Happiness is of our own doing, and Destiny lies in our OWN hands’.
Of course, it helps if your personal Saviour or all the Gods in heaven is supportive of the realisation of what lies on your planning board.
Even though I consider Jesus Christ as my personal Saviour, I do recall one of the Dalai Lama’s wise teachings, i.e. – ‘We should only live in the Present’.